In my work as a psychotherapist and counsellor, I’ve had the privilege of walking alongside many individuals with disability, particularly those who are neurodivergent, including people with autism, ADHD, and intellectual disability. My clients are not broken. They are not puzzles to be solved. They are complex, deeply feeling, and uniquely expressive people who often move through a world that wasn’t built with them in mind.
Therapy, in this context, isn’t about changing someone to “fit” societal norms. It’s about creating space, sometimes for the first time, where someone is truly heard, accepted, and supported in a way that honours who they are, not who they are expected to be.
Why Neurodivergent-Affirming Therapy Matters
Traditional therapeutic approaches can unintentionally pathologise neurodivergence. When we use deficit-based language, focusing on what's “wrong” or what needs “fixing, we risk reinforcing the same exclusion and shame many neurodivergent individuals already experience in school, the workplace, and even at home.
A neurodivergent-affirming approach respects and validates different ways of thinking, processing, and engaging with the world. For autistic clients, that might mean adjusting communication styles, embracing directness, avoiding metaphors, or allowing silence. For clients with ADHD, it could involve exploring creative strategies for emotional regulation or focus, without framing impulsivity as a personal failure. For individuals with intellectual disability, it means slowing down, checking for understanding, and being present with curiosity and care.
The goal is not to make people “mask” better, it’s to help them feel safe enough to unmask.
Holding Space for Emotional Safety
Many neurodivergent individuals come to therapy carrying the weight of rejection, misdiagnosis, trauma, or ongoing experiences of being misunderstood. They’ve been told to behave, to try harder, to be “less much.” They may have developed anxiety, depression, or shame as a result, not because they are neurodivergent, but because of how they have been treated for being different.
In my sessions, I work to offer a grounded, non-judgemental space. This includes things that may seem small but are deeply impactful: dimmed lights, reduced noise, flexible session pacing, and honouring sensory needs. We go at the client’s pace, sometimes using visuals, writing, or movement instead of conversation. Some of the most meaningful moments in therapy happen in silence, when someone finally feels safe just to be.
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Working with People with Intellectual Disability
Supporting individuals with intellectual disability often involves working collaboratively, not just with the person in the room, but also their support network. This might include carers, family members, or disability support professionals. My role isn’t to speak for my client but to help them find the tools, confidence, and voice to speak for themselves, however that looks.
Therapy in this space can include exploring relationships, grief, emotional expression, boundaries, and self-esteem. It’s about treating each person with the same dignity, autonomy, and emotional depth that any of us would expect in a therapeutic relationship.
Counselling Is for Everyone
There’s still a harmful myth that therapy is only for a certain “type” of person, typically verbal, reflective, and highly self-aware. But therapy can and should be accessible and inclusive. This means adapting our practices, expanding our definitions of communication, and listening to what each individual needs.
I often say that the most important thing I do is listen and believe. When someone tells me they are overwhelmed by sounds others don’t notice, I believe them. When they say that eye contact feels aggressive, I adjust. When they communicate in a way that doesn’t involve spoken words, I still listen, fully.
Final Thoughts
What has most profoundly shaped my therapy practice isn’t just professional training—it’s my lifelong, lived experience with intellectual disability and neurodivergence. Growing up immersed in this world has given me a deep, empathetic understanding of the challenges, strengths, and nuances that come with neurodivergent experiences. This insight informs every aspect of how I work, allowing me to meet clients where they are with authenticity, respect, and a truly neuroaffirming approach
Therapy can be a powerful space for healing, growth, and empowerment, but only when it’s built on the understanding that every brain, every way of being, is valid.
If you or someone you know is looking for a therapist who works in this space, I encourage you to reach out. You deserve to be supported by someone who sees your strengths, listens to your lived experience, and walks beside you, not ahead of you, on your journey.
